Twilight's Terminus - Season 1, "Uniform Sky"

There is a part of her that was hoping – against all logical sense – that Yilmaz would still turn up for their weekly spar. Despite the publicly available notice of his dishonorable discharge. Despite the fact that no one has even seen or heard from him since… that night. Despite every logical reason that screamed it would be impossible, Kukali had still hoped.

She could chalk it up to an expectation of a continued routine all she liked, the fact of the matter remains that hope had sunk between her ribs and made a home there, and now her heart is throwing a tantrum. Kukali bares her teeth at nothing. At the empty space that is where Yilmaz usually comes swaggering into while bringing his specific brand of nonsense in order to goad her into fighting at full force rather than holding back. The scarred socket that holds a cybernetic eye now throbs in a fitful reminder of the last time the two of them were even allowed to spar – a restriction that had lapsed only two days ago, and it’s been months…

In. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Out seven. Once more – in five, out seven. The floor still feels like it’s going to fall out from under her, like there are enemies around every corner, like she needs to go marching through the whole of the—- in seven, out five. Wait, no. That was backwards. Hissing in quiet displeasure, Kukali pretends the noise that follows isn’t a soft little whine of distress. Yilmaz would notice it, pick up on it, cajole and bait her into explaining what was so distressing, and then she’d be able to work out what exactly she needed in order to make it change from distress that she could do nothing about to something that she could attack on her own.

Except Yilmaz isn’t here, and it’s the five times damned Duce’s fault.

…Useless hope. It wasn’t a prank after all.

Oh there had been part of Kukali that had known that it wasn’t, but that doesn’t make it sting any less. At least the Duce doesn’t know of her involvement in part of… all of that. If he did, then he would have either sent for her in order to threaten or punish her already, or done something equally shady would have happened. Kukali had dressed and dealt with her gunshot wounds from McCrae on her own, and it hasn’t exactly been difficult to keep those wounds under wraps given… well.

The ice princex is well known for having no friends.

That’s not to say that Yilmaz’s friends haven’t made an attempt in the past, but Kukali doesn’t know what they think of her, and there’s no way to easily contact them even if she did think they would be willing to… help? Kukali doesn’t even know where to start with all of this. Besides, it’s better not to let on how much she knows about the situation even if she had been trying to convince herself it was all an elaborate prank.

“Think it’s a good idea to approach …her? Dude how in the fuck did Yilmaz ever know which pronouns to use at which point? Anyway, she’s been lingering there scowling for a good half hour. Think our ice princex got stung by one of those hallucinogenic bastards?”

“Nah man, think she’s just in one of those moods. Besides, you really feel like getting your ass beat just because you tried to take pity on the ice princex?”

…Right. The best place to lose herself in her thoughts is in her apartment. Not here, still scowling at where Yilmaz should be. Shaking her head, Kukali flicks a glance in the direction of the voices. She doesn’t get a good look at the speakers, not with the way both of them yelp and dive into the underbrush, but it’s a good point about getting moving. Her tail twitches in irritation as she pivots on her heel and starts walking.

Her focus wants to be off center, floating away some dozen feet behind and above her. She wants to keep ruminating over things, because going through the routine really isn’t helping. But not here – and Kukali learned her lesson years ago about travelling through the training center without paying close attention to the sounds around her.

Beyond the noise of several folks taking on something far too big for them, based on the colorful cursing, nothing gets in her way as she heads for the exit. No hiccups in the leaving process either – the quick quarantine as the sensors make sure nothing is hiding on her person, the additional closed room to sanitize anyway just in case the sensors missed anything, the final room where she has to show off her ID to the bored looking staff member waiting there. All of it goes like expected. Routine. Dull. Step by step.

An ordinary day. At least of the sort before Yilmaz transferred into this LAGOON.

The artificial sun hangs high and heavy in the sky, a gentle breeze filters through cleverly disguised fans inside ducts, and the sound of everyone else that lives here is a muted backdrop. Funny, how quickly everything feels the same. Maybe it’s unfair – Kukali hates most of the other LAGOON residents, so it’s never been worth it to try and sift through them all to find a few she can stand. Maybe Yilmaz’s friends might be on that list, but the last thing she wants is to put them in more danger. She knows what she overheard. What the Duce will never be able to erase from her memory, or from the internet now – she’s heard the recording that the Lodestar has and rage simmers in her chest so fast and hot that it almost feels like she’s going to melt around it.

How many of those around her have heard that recording and decided to go about their days like nothing’s changed? (Nothing has, really, but now Kukali knows things she didn’t know before, and the difference that makes is thick and difficult to swallow around). How many assume she’s the same? Does it matter? Not really, Kukali decides, though she finds herself far too tempted to march down the halls and turn in her Riptide resignation before she even gets her very first mission. If there was one like Yonah McCrae… she frowns, shaking her head. Who knows how many like him that the Duce is protecting? Who knows how many are abusing the rank of Riptide? It makes her feel distinctly ill – attaining Riptide is a dream she and Yilmaz shared even back in the orphanage, and only she managed to achieve it and—-

Kukali blinks. Her mechanical eye whirs. On autopilot, she’s found herself in front of the door to her old apartment. The one from before she made Riptide. It had been her home for so long, shared with a roommate whose name never stuck, but it’s not… this isn’t her home anymore. The promotion is still too fresh for autopilot to take her there without thinking, and Kukali swears she can hear the amused snort Yilmaz would give her. Shaking herself, Kukali focuses on what she’s doing and where she’s going instead – jaw clenched and scowl deeper.

Remembering the exact order of things is… annoying isn’t quite the right word, but it’s certainly close enough as far as she’s concerned. This is one of those side effects of the promotion that Kukali hadn’t actually planned out how to deal with, though if nothing else focusing on where she’s going allows her to have a good half hour of freedom from the circles her mind keeps chasing itself in. That, in of itself, is worth something.

Lingering in front of her apartment door – the right one, this time, Kukali takes a breath and bats a paw at the hope that’s trying to chirp on in her chest right now.

Slinking into the apartment, Kukali turns and locks the door on reflex, then flops onto the couch that Yilmaz made her buy the moment she got this place. If he was going to suddenly appear anywhere, it would probably be here. Hope chirps in her chest anyway, a demanding baby bird, pushy about how it needs wings to be able to actually fly around the cage she calls her chest. Kukali ignores it, even knowing that ignoring it won’t help in the long run. It’s the only thing she actually has in store. Attempt to melt into this couch and ignore the hope that’s trying so hard to make her life more complicated.

Focus on the mission she received this morning. The one where the Duce poked and prodded and seemed to know absolutely nothing about Kukali’s intervention. It’s her first official mission as Riptide, picking up the pieces from where McCrae’s removal sent some plans scattering and dissolving into nothing at all. Tactically, the poking and prodding makes sense. Find out how much she may or may not have been turned against the Duce and the Lagoon itself, have a method in place for what to do if she does need to be eliminated.

Unfortunate for the Duce that Kukali is so well trained. Tactics, especially the kind that allow Kukali to sit and gnaw on them, are one of her specialties. She’s not going to lose, here and now. There’s too much at stake for her to risk losing.

Speaking of gnawing on things, Kukali’s breathing slows and evens out as she gets to her feet – slow and careful and silent. Her apartment is quiet. Someone’s turned off the air purifier that she owns, and the little hum of various other things have also either been changed (her microwave is an inch and a half to the right, which means the buzz of it being on is off by a few degrees) or removed. Her floor is cleaner, like someone came through with plans of cleaning everything and didn’t account for what Yilmaz often called Kukali Brand Hypervigilance.

Time for a disguised patrol route around her apartment. Pretending to get comfortable. Too quiet is wrong, and Kukali finds herself grateful for the extra features that Yilmaz bought to go with the eye even if she’d hated them at first. It allows her to run scans and swap visible registers in order to look around her apartment while she acts like she really needs to get something out of her bedroom, dropping bits of clothing along the way.

She totally, absolutely, needs to change clothes and that’s entirely why she’s doing it. According to the thermal imaging, the shape in her bedroom believes this so she’s going to take full advantage of it.

Trying to attack her in her own den is an insult, is the kind of thing that others have killed for. That she has killed for.

The growl rumbling in the back of her throat is all feline and not entirely a conscious decision, tail swaying back and forth behind her silently. Kicking the door open means she’ll need to have the door repaired later, but Riptide Agents are reimbursed for a certain amount of damage to their own apartments per year – so Kukali really isn’t too fussed about it. Short knife to the underside of the would-be assailant’s throat and-

A familiar yelp. “H-hey…. Kukali…”

Exhaling, Kukali steps back and slides the knife back into the thigh holster that it lives in. “…This was unwise.” she says, falling back on the short and frigid personality that so many expect out of her. She doesn’t know Saranyu very much beyond the fact that the big woman is one of Yilmaz’s friends.

“There aren’t any cameras in here. Chaisee checked for me.” Saranyu argues, slowly standing up. “So… uh… well. And none of us have your personal contact, so…” she trails off. “With Yilmaz gone, and apparently just completely missing, we wanted to be able to check in on you.”

Kukalii blinks. Once. Twice. Then she heaves a sigh and turns her back on Sara, walking back out of her bedroom and collecting her shed garments as she goes. Check on her? For what reason do any of them have to check on her?! She can handle all of this just as well without them, so there’s no real reason… irritation bubbles in the back of her throat, all sour and disgusting. “You should leave.”

“Ain’t you wor-” Saranyu begins, faltering when she finds herself on the receiving end of a glare so frigid that she swears she can feel the temperature in the apartment drop forty degrees.

“Why are you here?” Kukalu asks, frowning. The frown softens her glare a little – enough that Saranyu isn’t flinching as hard as she was before, if nothing else. “You and the others are Yilmaz’s friends, not mine. So why are you here?”

Sara weighs her options. Kukali is as skilled as Yilmaz is, but with a remarkably shorter temper. She can’t handle a fight against Yilmaz, so she needs to figure out how to keep this from ending up a fight with Kukali. “…Yilmaz cares about you, so we do too.” she leads with, watching Kukali’s face as she says it. It’s the truth, but Kukali is as jaded as Yilmaz warned them all that she was. She squints instead of taking that, so Saranyu plays the next card she has for this purpose. “Chaisee also intercepted the recording of that docking bay that day. Yesterday afternoon.” Wrong phrasing, Kukali’s glare indicates she takes that as more of a threat than anything else. “We got a contact of ours to doctor it before it reached the Duce.” A verbal olive branch. Also the truth, and maybe this information will help keep Sara in one piece…?

One pale grey eye widens. “So you saw-” the quick nod is all the actual answer that she needs. “I don’t have any information on where he is now.”

“We didn’t think that you did.” Saranyu says quickly, putting both hands up. “But linking up with you is probably the best option any of us have. Rehema’s made sure we’re all aware of how much danger we’re in, and how much danger you’re in. So… so we wanted to check in on you. See if you were okay. Chaisee has some contacts that owe favors if you still need to be seen to for that gunshot wound.”

It’s… it’s strange. Kukali doesn’t know how to actually deal with this situation. With others caring about her status. Yilmaz is special – he’s always cared, even if he had some of the weirdest possible ways of showing it for the longest time. But to be told that… that this group of friends that he’s built is worried about her as well because they care about him so much that it spills over to her as well… that’s something that she has no idea how to actually handle. Maybe some part of that shows in her face, because Sara offers her a warm smile that is pretty plainly meant to be comforting.

Kukali breathes, one hand dropping down to where the gunshot wound is indeed still bothering her. She’d assumed she’d been doing really good keeping it secret, but they’ve seen the video to maybe it makes sense that they could see how well it was bothering her. “….It wouldn’t hurt to have more experienced eyes getting a good look at it.” she says after a moment more.

“I’ll tell Chaisee and she can get that set up!” Saranyu is far too bouncy for the moment, all bright and clearly more than a little excited about the way things have gone. “Have you gotten your first riptide mission? We can try to get everything set up before you have to go.”

A slow nod. “Yes. I have to arrange my own transportation, so Chaisee can have her people meet me on the train.” Now she fetches the folder from where she stashed it before she went to go meet up with Yilmaz. It’s heartening that Saranyu is careful not to look at the folder too hard. While Kukali is struggling with how she feels about the LAGOON as a whole right now, the secrecy of missions is important.

Still…

Kukali sits down on the couch, the tip of her tail flicking back and forth as she opens up the folder, staring at the strange symbols. There isn’t any way to translate it in the folder itself, and the oddness of that rubs Kukali wrong in far too many directions. “…I have a bad feeling about this particular mission.” she murmurs to herself, frowning.

That’s enough for Sara to peer over her shoulder and hum. “Those symbols right there. I’ve seen them before. On some of Rehema’s stuff. You want me to get her to meet up with you on the train too?” beat of silence, and then– “We could all show up on the train! I’ve done the secret agent stuff before with turning up on the train! Yilmaz made sure we all knew how just in case we ever needed to get away from the LAGOON.”

She considers the words for a moment. “Sounds like a very good idea to me.” Kukali says, voice low. “Then I’ll meet you all on the train, and we can figure out more from there. For now, I’m going to memorize this folder and get ready for my mission. I’ll-” that tail goes still, and Kukali exhales. “Stay here until I decide which train I’m taking. I don’t want to talk about this over messages. Then you can tell the others in person as well.”

Saranyu nods. She appreciates the way Kukali is capable of just… taking charge like this. It’s impressive and heartening all at once. They’re in good hands – and they’ll make sure Kukali is in good hands too.

And together, they’ll find out what happened to their mutual friend.